Over the Top has recently learned that the passing of former Pantera guitarist Dimebag Darrell Abbott was not all that it seemed to be. Over the Top has had people working on the inside as scientific researchers for last two years and have been able to confirm a shocking discovery to us. It turns out that after his tragic death, doctors at an undisclosed location in Texas managed to preserve Abbott’s head by cryogenically freezing it in an element that would bring his head back to life.
Over the Top was able to obtain the scientific notes of head researcher Dr. Mortimer Ichabod and the notes disclosed to shocking news.
“After the passing of Mr. Dimebag, we were able to sever his head and after several failed attempts were able to cryogenically freeze it. We worked with different states and mediums of freezing and nothing seemed to bring his head back to life. Finally we realized that the best way to attempt to resuscitate his cranium was to submerge it in an element that would revitalize it. At this, we submerged the head of Mr. Dimebag in a clear keg of Milwaukee’s Best beer and right away the eyes opened and we noticed him mouthing something that we were able to decipher as a message to his child saying only, “GET CHA PULL, SON.” We are not quite sure what that means and we were unaware that Mr. Dimebag had any children but nontheless we are excited at this advance in progress.”
Over the Top Metal News has also been made aware that Abbot’s cyrogenically frozen head in the clear keg of Milwaukee’s Best will make an appearance at the 2016 Wacken Festival during an all-star jam that will feature the surviving members of Pantera, Five Finger Death Punch, Taylor Swift, and Lady Gaga. Following this appearance, it also appears that Abbott’s surviving girlfriend Rita Haney has made plans to take the head on what is being dubbed as the “Getcha Pull One More Time” tour. Mr. Dimebag’s head will make its way across the US making appearances at biker rallies, bar & grills, and truckstops. For 10 bucks each, fans will be able to get their photo next to the head which will also included a commemorative laminate, 8×10 photo, and a Dimebag Darrell head key chain.
Keep your eyes posted for the official announcement to come soon but just remember, you heard it here at Over The Top first!